|In this final reflection on St. Joseph, we examine his great devotion to his spouse Mary in the hopes of uncovering a witness that can guide us in our relationship with our spouse and girlfriends. (Note: even though the boyfriend and girlfriend relationship is less than ideal for this reflection given its obvious limitations, nonetheless, I wanted to address this for those readers who are not yet married). |
No one can argue that despite Joseph and Mary’s lack of sexual relations that their marriage was not fruitful in the sense of being open to life. Their mutual love of God was an extremely “fertile fiat” and gave the world as we know it “the way, the truth and the life” (John 14:6). In fact, it is the most fertile fiat ever because in a certain sense their mutual exchange of love begot Christ who is the redemption of the world. Better stated, Christ’s humanity is the fruit of Mary and Joseph’s love of Him. This analogy is extremely limited because we know Christ always was and always is and so His existence can never be the fruit of anyone’s love, but it is helpful in our reflection to ponder Christ as the result of Joseph and Mary’s spousal love. As husbands and future husbands, we must enter into Joseph and Mary’s love of Christ if we are ever going to love our wives properly and devotedly.
Joseph’s witness of perpetual virginity teaches us as men to be sacrificial lovers. From my own meditation, I believe St. Joseph was always asking himself. ‘How can I better serve Jesus and Mary?’ That’s a good starting point for us as we approach our wives and future wives. Ask yourself each day the following question:
How can I better serve Jesus and my wife?
Start there brothers, and see that your heart doesn’t soften and change. It is a total self-giving kind of question isn’t? Not an easy one to do in a culture that promotes many self-serving practices.
Our roles as husbands and future husbands in training, is to tend to our wives spiritual and emotional needs. Ask your wife men, how are you doing spiritually? Do you need to go to confession? How can I help you so that you can get the time you need to satisfy your eternal needs?
Ask your wife men, how can I better help you to fulfill your role as mother? She is the “heart of the home” men! As I like to say in my house, if mom isn’t happy nobody is happy! We as men need to be mindful never to usurp her role in the home. As “heads of our homes”, we must always strive to support and compliment her role as the heart of the home.
And finally men, plan a date night! It’s easy to forget when the kids come into the equation how she still desires romance, spontaneity and adventure. Do something special for her and do it as often as possible!
Mind and tend to her womanly heart brothers and you will learn and live out appropriate spousal love and become more like St. Joseph.
St. Joseph, patron of husbands, pray for us!